Last night was pretty heavy at the guys sex series discussion at my church. The topic was emotional grooming, basically the idea of using someone for sexual activity.
I think it was heavy for a few reasons, one I have a tendency to mentally try to pick apart and analyze any kind of teaching, the process of questioning things–it’s who I am. For the second half of the dicussion, I honestly felt like I wanted to cry–but oddly enough there was this manly man thing inside me that did it’s best to hide it. And when you do that to a topic such as this it takes a lot out of you. It’s also hard because I know people who have been victims of it. Why would anyone do this to someone? I guess it’s all part of the lie: sin.
I’ve never been the victim of emotional grooming. But I’ve kind of realize that God really protected me in high school. I was kind of an insecure guy, not really popular or anything, and I’ve could of easily been taken advantage of and used. I had a need and needed. However, the girls I was closest to were all very godly and trustworthy, so I was safe. Eventually, I would get to the point where I would realize that, “Hey, God made me into a pretty awesome guy, I can definately be someone incredible for someone else.” Instead of having a need that needed to be filled, I had a something wonderful to give to someone else: me.
Next week should be a lot better, it’s about what a good relationship looks like. I’ve been asked to take notes. I have a couple of ideas of what a good relationship might look like. One thing I’ve never realized before was that you learn together; you’ll learn what that good relationship looks like, together. And I don’t think you’ll come to the point where you have everything figured out, and it’s going to be smooth sailing from that point on. No, it doesn’t work like that, which is kind of reasuring because I know now things will never get boring because we will be falling in love with each other over and over again.
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